'My soul is overwhelmed to the point of death' is so deeply powerful. The Son of God moved to such dark depths ... reading this passage again i realize all over how my mind and heart is just unable to grasp the struggle in Jesus' soul that night in the garden. He knew what was coming - no 'ignorance was bliss for him'. He knew the physical, spiritual and relational pain he was about the endure on the cross. Knowing that His Father was to turn from Him and He would be alone ... for the first time in His life.
And that Jesus would ask for help from simple men is such a lovely, human touch. and how human that they failed him. Eyes heavy, exhausted, they gave in to the pull of their flesh. Makes me think of the areas my flesh is weak, even though my spirit is willing even longing to do the right thing. Jesus, forgive me. Spirit, strengthen my flesh to obey.
can i say, 'yet not as i will, but as you will' about the most important things in my life - career, family, my very life? it is easier on small items ... but how about what is most valuable to me? that, like Jesus, is a struggle. but at least i know my Friend Jesus struggled just like me.
But ultimately, this passage is about Jesus and His struggle and pain and also resolve to do the Father's will. i know i can never fully grasp the torment of my Savior's soul that night, but help me, Jesus, not forget it either.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
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As I read over the passage, the humanity of Jesus leaped out at me again and again. Sometimes I forget that he was both human and God, and that every temptation we struggle with he also had to deal with.
Then I tried to put myself into his position - preparing for a harsh death on the cross, which he could willingly avoid at any time - and I wondered what I would do. I doubt that I would have the strength to do what he did, and the fact that he did it willingly makes it all the more powerful.
The disciples actions through all of this never cease to amaze me. They almost seem oblivious through this passage and the previous ones we have read that anything is going to happen to Jesus, even though for me looking at the passage it is blatantly obvious that Jesus is going to die. Sometimes, though, I am just like the disciples, and God is hinting at something, and I just don't see it at all. I never take the chance to step back from my life and look at the big picture. I think that if maybe I did this more often, small things that at first glance have no meaning would take a much larger significance.
v. 39a: "Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed..." Just imagine the passion, pain, and just very huge emotions that Jesus must be feeling at this point. It all literally swept Him off His feet - praying, probably through tears, sweat, all that kind of stuff that goes with it, after having FALLEN face first on the ground, not out of sight of His disciple friends.
I agree with what Nate and Bruce have said, though also want to throw in a new angle or two: look at HOW Jesus dealt with suffering. That in itself is a great example to us! He didn't carry that burden on His own, didn't toughen up and "just deal with it", rather He gathered His friends together and asked them to be there with Him and offer up a simple prayer or two, sharing with Him at this point. I am sure this rings true with others of you too; I am horrible at this! When I suffer, my instinct is to toughen up, press through whatever it is. Or even, I unrealisticly expect people to instinctly know when I am suffering and that they will come and ask me about it. Yeah, that's a ridiculous expectation!
Jesus shows us here something greater - Christian community, the fellowship of the believers. Let's gather together, rejoicing with those who rejoice and mourning with those who mourn - truly being there for the others and also calling them close, letting them be near for us.
I was struck in the same way that Nate was when I read this passage and I reached the part about Jesus' discples and their apparent apathy about what Jesus was going through.
its so obvious when I'm reading it now, with 20/20 hindsight. What's harder is realiaing when I, as Jesus disciple right now, do the very same thing. I ignore Jesus when he is trying to share with me, and get bored/tired and fall asleep! Hard to believe, but I know its true. This is a good reminder to me about how important it is to listen to His small still voice.
I agree with everything that everyone has said so far and I really see so many things in me I need to change and work on.
Also, for me, one thing this passage really made me realize was Christ's humanity. There are so many times that I view Jesus as this superhero character who came to earth and lived among us but was never truly affected by the things of the world. There are other instances in the Bible where Jesus is shown as human, having to deal with temptation and pain etc... but for me, this is one example that really makes me see it and understand it.
Jesus' humanity is fully revealed in this passage through His struggle with suffering. No one who is human enjoys suffering. He is 'sorrowful' and 'troubled'. He even says, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." Not the words that come from the mouth of an indestructible superhero.
I guess so many times I just envision Jesus swooping down in His cap to rescue humanity. It is really easy to think about Jesus as GOD! and then just quickly add that he was a human too. Maybe sometimes I think humanity takes away from His Godliness? BUT THE TRUTH IS JESUS IS THE SON OF GOD AND THE SON OF MAN!
In the devo, I saw to examples of humanity. There is Jesus, who is completely human and yet completely perfect, and then I see the disciples (me) who are sinful and cannot even stay awake when they are needed most.
This passage really spoke to me about the humanity of Jesus as well. Not like "oh, the humanity," but the similarities between Jesus and ME. We know he didn't and still doesn't know everything about God's plans, but he clearly understood before he even came down what would be required of him (ridicule and death and the ultimate loneliness) and what a radical change that would be for every human ever. And yet, no matter how strong he was able to be about it throughout his life - and I'm sure he had moments where he wished it would come sooner just so the bridge would be there and no one would have to worry about it being prevented or delayed all intermingled with moments in which he didn't want to even think about the process - when Jesus was down to the wire, every inch of his humanity kicked and screamed and wriggled and failed and said, "God, if there is a way [even though he KNEW that THIS was the only way and it was going to be how it happened], PLEASE take this cup from me."
That's exactly like me. Even when God and I have a gameplan and I'm feeling strong because I've been meeting with Him, when the going gets tough, I immediately start to think of ways out. This passage is the best argument I can think of for the humanity of Jesus because it is so EXACTLY what I would have done if I was in his position.
Also, the desire to have friends around in his time of suffering: that's me all over. Even if, like in this situation, those friends can't exactly understand what I'm going through, I seek out as many genuinely caring hearts as I can for comfort and company. It must have been so bittersweet and miserable for Jesus that night. Being surrounded by his best friends yet at the same time - already - feeling SO ALONE.
I was also thinking about how the disciples failed Jesus. It was not by doing something wrong - it was by NOT doing what he had asked them to do. That's also exactly like me. Knowing the Bible as much as I do, which isn't even that much compared to some people, my sin sometimes seems less like sins of comission and more like sins of omission. It's easy to not murder someone. It's harder to make that leap and talk to that non-Christian friend about God or church or religion or anything along those lines - even when I KNOW that the HS is prompting it!!!
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